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Etiquette and Style Guide

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In roleplay, etiquette and style are often intertwined due to the heavy amount of interpersonal interaction involved. This document is intended to give a set of basic guidelines which can ensure a smoother play experience for everyone.



Etiquette can be defined as how a player interacts out-of-character.


First and foremost, always remember that everyone you interact with is another person worthy of respect as a unique individual. In OOC interactions, you should always be doing the following:

  • Respect others' preferences, even if you don't share them.
  • Be polite, no matter what you may feel about the other person.
  • Be aware of your feelings, and avoid taking out any negative emotions on others.
  • Remember to give back as much as you take.


Tapestries is, at its core, a big collaborative fiction-writing environment. While characters may dislike one another, quarrel, fight, or even come to blows, it's all part of the story that you're weaving with your fellow players. As such:

  • Remember that roleplay isn't a competitive game: there's no reason to try to "win" or make others "lose".
    • In conflict-oriented roleplay in particular, it's important to remember that just because your character loses a fight, it doesn't mean that you as a player lost!
    • "Winning" at the expense of another player's feelings means that the roleplay should never have happened. Simple as that.
  • Acknowledge others when approached. There's no reason to ignore people who try to speak to you.
  • Approach others if you want to speak to them or roleplay with them. It may be hard or intimidating, but roleplay only happens if someone says hello!


In my experience, a failure to communicate is the biggest and most pervasive cause of player conflict on Tapestries. Improving communication can solve many problems before they ever start.

  • Before roleplay:
    • Ask if the people you want to roleplay with are okay with starting a scene or you joining one already in progress.
    • Tell people if you want something specific from the scene, or have a particular direction you'd like the roleplay to go.
  • During roleplay:
    • If something in a scene makes you uncomfortable, say something.
      • Share your concerns with the other person.
      • Discuss to see if you can agree on another direction for the scene.
      • Whatever you do, don't just "man up" and bury your discomfort, or leave without saying anything. Bottling your concerns breeds resentment, and leaving without saying anything is considered quite rude.
    • Similarly, be alert to the other player's behavior. If they seem uncomfortable or distracted, be proactive and ask them if there's something you can do differently.
    • If you need to leave early, let your roleplay partner(s) know.
  • After roleplay:
    • Thank your partner(s) for the scene.
    • It's considered polite to ask others if they're alright with you WatchFor-ing them. Some also take it as a complement!


The second biggest cause of conflict that I'm aware of is due to players becoming upset about what's happening in-character. There isn't a list associated with this idea, just a single recommendation: remember that IC should be separate from OOC and that others' characters are often completely different from who they are in real life! If something in a scene upsets you, communicate about it.


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